My Disagreement with Dr. Phil On Today’s Social Media Cinderella with Pivot Point
How heartbreaking would it be to watch an entire generation falling apart because of a constant need for instant reward above delayed gratification? Julien Dimastromatteo PhD
Well, Dr. Phil, as a psychologist and an arbiter of our society, seems to be taking another look at social media impacts. Recently, Sept. 12, 2019, he had a show called Desperate for Insta-Fame. He introduced a 21-year-old woman called Jessy who spent over 11 hours a day researching, planning and taping outrageous content for people to like and follow her.
Do What Others Won’t Do
There she sat with long black hair, heavy eye makeup, lacquered lips, expensive cut-out pumps with Cinderella glass heels, and long fingernails curling into glossy arcs with sequined flower details … very exclusive, waving them in front of Dr. Phil.
She was proud to be a Social Media Influencer with 100,000 Instagram followers she said who looked forward to her posts, the more offensive the better. She bragged the more stupid you act, the more views you get. Her motto is “Do What Others Won’t Do” like stealing a sandwich off a customer’s plate and running away on video tape. It’s the shock value where people “hate to love you,” she explained. My head spins … is this the be-nasty fuel, the ignition on social media, that befits the spectators watching would-be internet gladiators?
What does celebrity mean?
She bragged about her celebrity status standing out in parties and hooking up with guys but only if they had more followers than her. Then her Tweeter and Instagram were temporarily shut down because of racist tweets which were reactive to other posts not personal at all she said. But her despair had hit the worst possible tragedy from making 500K dollars, as claimed, to living off food stamps with beautiful fingernails and shoes. She was “nothing without her followers.” But exactly, who are these faithful subjects with nothing better to do than watch fools making fun of themselves?
When faced by a life counselor who outlined the values of being yourself but only better (title of his book), she dapped away a few tears saying she didn’t have much parental guidance or friends growing up.
Dr. Phil asked her to do one thing every day over 5 days to turn her life around. The advice was to go to a soup kitchen or homeless shelter and serve lunch to people who truly had nothing and no excuses.
I don’t know, Dr. Phil, if serving people as a scullery maid will enlighten her potential in the real or virtual world. Can her brain ingrained with so much self-flattery and disrespecting rights of others over years on social media be changed with a few hours of volunteer work?
We are all familiar with Cinderella, a poor mistreated girl who finds her dream through magic fairies turning pumpkins into royal coaches and a glass slipper who wins the hand of a prince to live happily ever after. But what about the social landscapes in today’s hyper-charged domains especially for young teenage girls looking for some magical happy-for-ever-after, side-by-side with celebrities who really like them?
Certainly, we are socially engaged to a new princess or prince called the influencers who oversee some of the largest gatherings found on YouTube and Instagram. We admire and trust them to buy their choices of fashion, food, entertainment, sports, colleges or favorite restaurants.
For example, a top You Tuber with 100,000 loyal followers or more can expect to generate thousands from advertisements by plugging their favorite products or stores. An Instagram user with 100,000 followers can command $5,000 for a post made in partnership with a company or brand.
Making 2 points with a Big Question:
As consumers, we have always followed trends or word of mouth recommendations.
1. What kind of consumerism is based on the flagrant and outrageous behavior of a selfie brand that says I am so crazy but respect me, like me and follow me? How does stupidity become a trend?
2. There is no doubt that social engagement and personal information are today’s currency, easy to collect and manipulate.
However, the big question is how fair is this to vulnerable teenagers as to what to like, where to go and who your friends are; not withstanding these bizarre selfie-jesters who juggle craziness for viral fame by stealing sandwiches or licking ice cream containers in supermarkets.
I’m sorry, but one week of KP duty will not win the battle to reset social norms.
Social Pivot Point Now
Our culture needs a pivot point now starting at the heart of this social media energizing confluence. Almost all of us have experienced various degrees of its value systems: cultural, economic, psychological and individual.
The bad news is we cannot allow the 7 short adolescent teen years to be dominated by negative social media value systems to last a lifetime.
The good news is we can look backwards at what we have learned, understand scientific research and project new positive accomplishments for better long-term results for personal growth and development, not distraction, amorality and futility.
In my opinion, we need a far more serious intervention with a common interface for everyone to participate with an in-depth discussion on two topics:
1. How to stop social media from taking advantage of a rash and brash teenage brain still in development
2. How to encourage the value of Time and power of choice as a superpower tool to avoid making bad mistakes that may affect the total Timeline
We certainly need leaders to guide this intervention and get this unilateral message across to every young person:
Your offline time is more valuable than your online time.
What is your opinion about this modern day Cinderella? Do you think that Dr. Phil’s solution will get results? What do you think can help this young woman and teenagers in general?
I look forward to your opinions and comments … always important.
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Excerpt from Teen Girl Faces Time in the Sand:
Today the real tragedy with young people is how to overcome the huge problems created by a Giant Media Monster; like a Medusa manipulator using her vast army of words and images to twist, to seduce and undermine the ability of people to think critically and freely. It’s like a vast army of fake selfies attacking what’s good and normal.
The great personal tragedy is made worse because most young people do not use their real characters to take offensive action but rather create their own fake Selfies to closely reflect what the Media Monster promotes. These are soldiers on the same side with the same goals which means the Monster wins every time. Like I said before, the Monster has no regret for what it is doing; it will never apologize if you keep liking her artificial ugliness again and again.